day of departure ✈️

i wholeheartedly believe that if you were to tell me two years ago the ways that God has moved in my life and where i am right now, i would have laughed so hard in your face. but as i’m sitting in the airport awaiting a flight to nicaragua where i’ll spend the next semester, i’m confident in the God who really did rescue me from all my hurt and worldly ambitions. thinking about who i was two years ago… the girl who would never believe she was enough or that if she was, she always somehow overdid it and was too much makes my heart ache for how lost she was. but a heart that was reflecting this world instead of Him couldn’t see how a mission trip or anything involving glorifying something other than herself would be any good. and most of all that heart couldn’t see where selfishness ended and where obedience began. thinking about the girl who walked into an informational meeting two years ago with absolutely no motivation, a broken heart, and a lack of any form of identity outside of this world. i wish i could shake her and tell her that her whole entire WORLD was going to be flipped upside down, all because God moves. that after a trip so out of her comfort zone, there was no way for her to rely on anything other than Jesus. how His love transcends cultures, every language, every circumstance, she would come home so radically changed that she would never live life the same. to go from someone with no intention of living a life worthy of Him, to working two jobs senior year to travel and go to those places where you could feel His presence like no other. to a land where unicorns get painted on faces, where kids play in the dust and find joy in the simple things, where everything is twice as hard to come by but that makes it twice as valuable. a lot like Gods love. because heaven shouldn’t feel like miles away to anyone. praying and praying that a heart that only wanted to be closer to Him would be enough. well, that heart and prayer would soon become the basis of a faith with such a faithful God. and if there is one thing i can promise anyone reading this it’s that the same God who has moved mountains and changed hearts is working in your life. and right now as i step into the extremely unknown, that is really one of the only things i can take comfort in. that He is ALWAYS present, always faithful, always open, always for me, always sufficient, and always always ALWAYS GOOD. so i pray you take comfort in that, bc no matter where you are, if you are living for Him… you too are a missionary.